If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.

My family was so poor the lady next door gave birth to me.

If God wanted you to putt cross-handed, he would have made your left arm longer.

I'm not scared of very much. I've been hit by lightning and been in the Marine Corps for four years.

A rough should have high grass. When you go bowling they don't give you anything for landing in the gutter, do they?

Yes, I think I have the best swing on the Tour. Why have scores comedown in the last ten years? Partly because they are imitating me.

I'm not out there just to be dancing around. I expect to win every time I tee up.