I keep lot of my opinions to myself.

I thought Manual Labor was a Mexican golf pro.

Two things that are not long for this world: dogs that chase cars and professional golfers who putt for pars.

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.

I still sweat. My guts are still grinding out there. Sometimes I have enough cotton in my mouth to knit a sweater.

My wife doesn't care what I do when I'm away, as long as I don't have a good time.

No one who ever had lessons would have a swing like mine.