If it wasn't for golf, I don't know what I'd be doing. If my IQ had been two points lower, I'd have been a plant somewhere.

Pressure is trying to make a putt for a $10 bet with only $5 in your pocket.

Arnie has more people watching him park the car than we do out on the course.

Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course.

They say I'm famous for my chip shots. Sure, when I hit 'em right, they land just so, like a butterfly with sore feet.

I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.

Somewhere along the line I'll be recognized as one of the top players in the Nicklaus era. That's all I want to be remembered for.