Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.

Darwin's theory is as dead as he is. Everyone is surviving, fit or not. Years ago, any kid dumb enough to chase a shiny object down a well was dead, and out of the gene pool. Now they got the technology and medicine to save the fool so he can breed more open mouth breathers.

Communism is just one big telephone company.

There's a lot of money in wars, except in the war on poverty. Can't make any bread helping the poor.

I'm sure that half the buzz from smoking grass was the fact that it was so illegal.

To say whatever nonsense comes into your head without any repercussions has got to be a bigger high than heckling a movie screen in a darkened theater.

The 'what should be' never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no 'what should be,' there is only what is.