You got a million drug laws now because the bosses figured there was more money in putting people in jail than taxing something anyone can grow on a window sill.

I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write songs like, "What I'm going to do if I grow up".

Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.

The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.

The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.

I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.

Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will someday become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves.