I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.

I was surprised when Nixon passed the test and showed up in heaven, but, I guess Hitler threw off the curve for our century.

There are no dirty words, only dirty minds.

All my humor is based upon destruction and despair.

It's the suppression of the word that gives it the power, the violence, the viciousness.

Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.

You got to pay your dues to get the joke. Besides, laughter is cheap and very portable. If there's a pogrom, or they're blaming you for the plague, nothing is easier to pack than a sense of humor.