I've got a friend who is a lion tamer. He used to be a school teacher till he lost his nerve.

I've got a friend who is a lion tamer. He used to be a school teacher till he lost his nerve.

My lad chewed and swallowed a dictionary. We gave him Epsom salts - but we can't get a word out of him.

My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.

The wife's Mother said, ‘When you're dead, I'll dance in your grave.’ I said: ‘Good, I'm being buried at sea’.

I knew I'd chosen the wrong airline when I noticed the sick bag had the Lord's Prayer on it.

I can always tell when the mother in law's coming to stay; the mice throw themselves on the traps.