My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.

I've got a friend who is a lion tamer. He used to be a school teacher till he lost his nerve.

Marriage is an institution and that's where a couple finishes up.

My mother-in-law had to stop skipping for exercise. It registered seven on the Richter scale.

I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite.

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind.

Everyone has a family tree; the Dawsons have one, it's a weeping willow.