There is a remote tribe that worships the number zero. Is nothing sacred?

How can you analyse what is funny? What's funny to one isn't funny to another... What's funny to you is a personal thing.

Funny thing how you first meet the woman that you marry. I first met the wife in a tunnel of love. She was digging it.

Last year my wife ran off with the fellow next door and I must admit, I still miss him.

The wife's Mother said, ‘When you're dead, I'll dance in your grave.’ I said: ‘Good, I'm being buried at sea’.

I need to give affection and love, because without that, I wither. I need to give that love to someone. Without that, I'm rudderless.

I know my name will always be linked with women.