Like a blind man at an orgy, I was going to have to feel my way through.

It's not really that I've been an advocate for hearing aids for a long time, it's just that I've been losing my hearing for a long time! So it's actually very important for me because I'm actually hearing impaired and I simply want to hear better!

Sometimes integrity is a punch in the face.

The reason there's a question mark on my front door is just in case I forget my address.

Do your part to silence gossip - don't repeat it.

I like that kind of 'straight-faced' comedy. I like to be straight-faced and outrageous.

I love comedy and I hope I never stop doing it.