I like my sex the way I play basketball, one on one with as little dribbling as possible.

Doing nothing is very tough to do because you never know when you're finished. The upside is that from the moment you wake up in the morning, you're on the job.

I really have to keep an eye on myself, because sometimes I think I might say something important.

The actual distance a bad golfer is going to hit the ball with any club obviously depends on many factors, not the least of which is whether the ball was actually hit at all.

Doing nothing is very hard to do... you never know when you're finished.

One thing a person won't do when he's laughing is try to beat you up.

I've finally found my home - as Lt. Frank Drebin.