Let's all start walking more and driving less.

God bless Merle Haggard. He did all the things that Johnny Cash was supposed to have done.

They tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat.

Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing.

Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

When My Love Returns from the Ladies Room, Will I Be Too Old to Care?