I don't like writing in front of a lot of people, it has to be an intimate experience with people I trust.

God, three weddings in one day, I'm going to be in Spanx for 12 hours. My elastic line is gonna get infected again.

I want to roll my eyes right now, but the doctor says that if I keep doing it, my ocular muscles might spasm and eject my eyeballs.

My mom used to send me articles about how older virgins are considered good luck in Mexico.

Did you really think I wouldn't recognize my college futon, with its trademark absence of sex stains?

I got into songwriting because I'm not very good at communicating sometimes, just my true words, so music was always my way of expressing myself and being able to put things into lyrics that I couldn't say necessarily in my everyday life.

Whatever the tiny bubbles sitting beautifully on the surface of the absolutely delicious-looking skin around his forehead and neck were, they were doing a lot for his overall appearance...and for my heart rate.