Being popular with an audience is a very rickety ladder to be on.

When I see two guys kissing, I'm like, how come I can't kiss one of those guys? They look like they're having a good time.

Sorry - Americans only buy things that come from suffering. They just enjoy it more when they know someone's getting hurt.

I know I'm getting old because there will be times when I'm not even doing anything and I'll think, 'I need to go wipe my ass right now.'

You have to be able to do a bunch of things at once, and not think about things you're not doing while you're doing other things. You have to be disciplined about not trying to do everything, all at the same time. It's hard and fun.

If you can survive disappointment, nothing can beat you

Working in TV and navigating success is a tricky thing. It's easier to navigate the hard work of starting out because you just do anything they let you do, but once you get into an orbit, after the thrusters have pushed you into the orbit, now you have to navigate that orbit. There's no choices when you're starting out. You're just like, "Please, let me do anything." But then it turns around and it's like, "We'll let you do anything".