I put my arm around her and said, "Jas, I have found that when you are troubled, it is often better to think of others rather than yourself. I think you would feel much better if you got me some milky coffee and jammy dodgers and I told you all about me.

He who laughs last laughs the laughiest.

Vaisey looked like a startled earwig.

Look, I can't go out with you, because... because... because I'm a lesbian.

Love is a many trousered thing.

Its okay I'm wearing really big knickers.

You are not ashamed of our luuurve, are you, Jas?' 'Look, shut up, people might hear.' 'What do you mean, the people who live in the telephone?