You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble.
A Consultant is a guy who knows 125 different ways to make love, but who doesn't know any women.
I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny.
The way money goes so fast these days, they should paint racing stripes on it.
If the audience doesn't like it, usually they're just silent. But they've never all walked out at once.
Young people, take heart: the older you get, the fewer commandments you will have the strength to break.