The Republicans have a new healthcare proposal: Just say NO to illness!

You know that a given in life in human nature, is that at a sporting event, a baseball game, a football game, you never introduce a politician, is because he'll be booed. I don't care if he's the most beloved person in the world, its part of the game.

I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny.

The way money goes so fast these days, they should paint racing stripes on it.

If the audience doesn't like it, usually they're just silent. But they've never all walked out at once.

You've got the brain-washed, that's the Democrats, and the brain-dead, that's the Republicans!

The thing that you're faulted on today is not that you are too tough, or not that you aren't careful. It's that you might have been too soft. People want that red meat now because you have to keep up with the mood and the mood today is harsh. It really is.