When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

They say that you can't live by bread alone, but I can live on compliments.

In German, a young lady has no sex, but a turnip has

Old habits cannot be thrown out the upstairs window. They have to be coaxed downstairs one step at a time.

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.

Do something everyday that you don't want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.

And always we had wars, and more wars, and still other wars - all over Europe, all over the world. "Sometimes in the private interest of royal families," Satan said, "sometimes to crush a weak nation; but never a war started by the aggressor for any clean purpose - there is no such war in the history of the race."