If you are a jackal, you will try to reassure. Jackals try to fix people in pain. They can't stand pain, but make matters worse by trying to get rid of it. Put on giraffe ears. Try to hear what they are feeling and needing.

We want people to change because they see better ways of meeting their needs at less cost, not because of fear that we're going to punish them, or 'guilt' them if they don't. This applies to ourselves as well.

All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.

Judgments of others contribute to self-fulfilling prophecies.

People do not hear our pain when they believe they are at fault.

However impressed we may be with NVC concepts, it is only through practice and application that our lives are transformed.

When we hear the other person's feelings and needs, we recognize our common humanity.