To practice NVC, it's critical for me to be able to slow down, take my time, to come from an energy I choose, the one I believe that we were meant to come from, not the one I was programmed into.

Empathizing with someone's 'no' protects us from taking it personally.

We want people to change because they see better ways of meeting their needs at less cost, not because of fear that we're going to punish them, or 'guilt' them if they don't. This applies to ourselves as well.

If we want to be compassionate we must be conscious of the words we use. We must both speak and listen from the heart.

Understanding and connection can transcend conflict.

If you have an image of someone cutting off a relationship, it's the cutting off that will lead to your suffering. If you see the action as their need being expressed, then the message is within them, not you. Any interpretation you put onto another person's message (such as passive-aggressive, withholding, etc.), you will pay for because of how you took it.

The only time a message (label) can scare us is if we think there is such a thing, and that such a thing is a disgrace.