We need to receive empathy to give empathy.

The Indian philosopher J. Krishnamurti once remarked that observing without evaluating is the highest form of human intelligence. When I first read this statement, the thought, 'What nonsense!' shot through my mind before I realized that I had just made an evaluation.

To be able to hear our own feelings and needs and to empathize with them can free us from depression.

I never have to worry about another person's response, only how I react to what they say.

The key to fostering connection in the face of a 'no' is always hearing 'yes' to something else.

Very often, the way love is defined, it does violence to both people. It almost makes them a slave to the other. For example, if to be in love, or to be married, it means that I'm responsible for the other person's happiness, now we get into this guilt game, where if they're upset, I'm at fault. Soon, that makes the person we are closest to about as much fun to be around as a prolonged dental appointment.

When people hear needs, it provokes compassion. When people hear diagnoses, it provokes defensiveness and attack.