The key to fostering connection in the face of a 'no' is always hearing 'yes' to something else.

Understanding the other persons' needs does not mean you have to give up on your own needs.

Focusing on the unmet need (not the judgment) is more likely to get the need met.

As soon as you say, "are you feeling X because I ..." Then the Jackal starts to salivate because he can educate the person that he's the cause of his pain.

I believe that the most joyful and intrinsic motivation human beings have for taking any action is the desire to meet our needs and the needs of others.

Empathize with silence by listening for the feelings and needs behind it.

NVC suggests behind every action, however ineffective, tragic, violent, or abhorrent to us, is an attempt to meet a need.