Interpretations, criticisms, diagnoses, and judgments of others are actually alienated expressions of our unmet needs.

I recommend allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before turning our attention to solutions or requests for relief. When we proceed too quickly to what people might be requesting, we may not convey our genuine interest in their feelings and needs; instead, they may get the impression that we're in a hurry to either be free of them or to fix their problem. Furthermore, an initial message is often like the tip of an iceberg; it may be followed by yet unexpressed, but related - and often more powerful - feelings.

The first step in healing is to put the focus on what's alive now, not what happened in the past.

In these long-standing conflicts, I find that most cases it gets resolved in about twenty minutes after each side can tell me the needs of the other.

When we have our consciousness on needs, images come to us, naturally, of how to meet those needs.

Get very clear about the kind of world we would like and then start living that way.

Needs are the expression of life through us.