In our culture, most of us have been trained to ignore our own wants and to discount our needs.
Marshall B. RosenbergEverything we do is in service of our needs. When this one concept is applied to our view of others, we'll see that we have no real enemies, that what others do to us is the best possible thing they know to do to get their needs met.
Marshall B. RosenbergIf I'm using Nonviolent Communication I never, never, never hear what somebody thinks about me. Never hear what somebody thinks about you, you'll live longer. You'll enjoy life more. Hear the truth. The truth is that when somebody's telling you what's wrong with you, the truth is they have a need that isn't getting met. Hear that they're in pain. Don't hear the analysis.
Marshall B. RosenbergViolence comes from the belief that other people cause our pain and therefore deserve punishment.
Marshall B. RosenbergAny evaluation which implies rightness or wrongness is a tragic, suicidal expression of an unmet need. Tragic, first because it decreases our likelihood of getting our need met! Even if we think it. And secondly, because it increases the likelihood of violence. That's why I'm suggesting any evaluation which implies rightness or wrongness is a tragic, suicidal expression of an unmet need. Say the need! Learn a need-consciousness.
Marshall B. Rosenberg