If we wish to express anger fully, the first step is to divorce the other person from any responsibility for our anger.

As we learn to speak from the heart we are changing the habits of a lifetime.

We use NVC to evaluate ourselves in ways that engender growth rather than self-hatred.

Avoid 'shoulding' on others and yourself!

I wouldn't expect someone who's been injured to hear my side until they felt that I had fully understood the depth of their pain.

When you ride the wave, the thrill is so exhilarating that you forget everything else. You live in the moment where nothing else matters, so intent on riding the wave perfectly that you and the wave become one. Pain and worry disappear, replaced by euphoria, akin to flow. Similarly, when giving empathy, you want to strive for this kind of total presence for the person you are listening to.

What others do may be the stimulus of our feelings, but never the cause.