When I am angry I have a judgment and an unmet need.

Blaming and punishing others are superficial expressions of anger.

The Chinese philosopher Chuang-Tzu stated that true empathy requires listening with the whole being: The hearing that is only in the ears is one thing. The hearing of the understanding is another. But the hearing of the spirit is not limited to any one faculty, to the ear, or to the mind. Hence it demands the emptiness of all the faculties. And when the faculties are empty, then the whole being listens. There is then a direct grasp of what is right there before you that can never be heard with the ear or understood with the mind.

People have been trained to criticize, insult, and otherwise communicate in ways that create distance among people.

If the other persons behavior is not in harmony with my own needs, the more I empathize with them and their needs, the more likely I am to get me own needs met.

At the core of all anger is a need that is not being fulfilled.

You don't have to be brilliant. It's enough to become progressively less stupid.