When I am angry I have a judgment and an unmet need.

Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.

Every moment each human being is doing the best we know at that moment to meet our needs. We never do anything that is not in the service of a need, there is no conflict on our planet at the level of needs. We all have the same needs. The problem is in strategies for meeting the needs.

They have most likely said it because they have an unmet need.

We are never angry because of what others say or do. It is our thinking that makes us angry.

I wouldn't expect someone who's been injured to hear my side until they felt that I had fully understood the depth of their pain.

Some people use NVC to respond compassionately to themselves, some to create greater depth in their personal relationships, and still others to build effective relationships at work or in the political arena. Worldwide, NVC is used to mediate disputes and conflicts at all levels.