People have been trained to criticize, insult, and otherwise communicate in ways that create distance among people.

As NVC replaces our old patterns of defending, withdrawing or attacking in the face of judgment and criticism. We come to perceive ourselves and others, as well as our intentions and relationships, in a new light. Resistance, defensiveness, and violent reactions are minimized.

Remember that whatever anyone does, it is an effort to meet a need.

Power-Over leads to punishment and violence. Power-With leads to compassion and understanding, and to learning motivated by reverence for life rather than fear, guilt, shame, or anger.

Get very clear about the kind of world we would like and then start living that way.

Empathizing with someone's 'no' protects us from taking it personally.

To practice the process of conflict resolution, we must completely abandon the goal of getting people to do what we want.