In NVC, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests.

If you think ahead to what to say next - like how to fix it or make the person feel better - BOOM! Off the board. You're into the future. Empathy requires staying with the energy that's here right now. Not using any technique. Just being present. When I have really connected to this energy, it's like I wasn't there. I call this "watching the magic show". In this presence, a very precious energy works through us that can heal anything, and this relieves me from my "fix-it" tendencies.

Behind intimidating messages are simply people appealing to us to meet their needs.

Every moment each human being is doing the best we know at that moment to meet our needs. We never do anything that is not in the service of a need, there is no conflict on our planet at the level of needs. We all have the same needs. The problem is in strategies for meeting the needs.

We are this divine energy. It's not something we have to attain. We just have to realize it, to be present to it.

Depression is the reward we get for being 'good'.

Regardless of our many differences, we all have the same needs. What differs is the strategy for fulfilling these needs.