When we understand the needs that motivate our own and others behavior, we have no enemies.

Fix-it jackals can't wait to fix it, because they don't know how to enjoy pain. And until you learn how to enjoy pain, you can't enjoy intimacy.

Instead of playing the game "Making Life Wonderful", we often play the game called "Who's Right". Do you know that game? It's a game where everybody loses.

You don't have to be brilliant. It's enough to become progressively less stupid.

Have you ever been surfing? Imagine you're on your surfboard now, waiting for the big one to come. Get ready to get carried with that energy. Now, here it comes. That's empathy. No words - just being with that energy. When I connect with what's alive in another person, I have feelings similar to when I'm surfing.

When I am angry I have a judgment and an unmet need.

Self-empathy in NVC means checking in with your own feelings and needs.