I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.

Everybody is clever, just in their own ways

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

This doesn't happen in America! Maybe Ohio, but not in America!" Homer Simpson

We've been running a little behind schedule. But only by about 15 years or so.

Public transportation is for jerks and lesbians.

A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!