All short women have a delayed fuse. Marry a taller woman: My wife was an inch or two taller than me; it's a sign of security.
Mel BrooksAs long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.
Mel BrooksRhetoric does not get you anywhere, because Hitler and Mussolini are just as good at rhetoric. But if you can bring these people down with comedy, they stand no chance.
Mel BrooksI was out in the combat engineers. We would throw up bridges in advance of the infantry but mainly we would just throw up.
Mel BrooksJewish women are very exciting, as exciting sexually as any other group. Even so, my advice to a young man marrying a Jewish girl would be to have three and a half years of foreplay. Of course, most girls in every group are reserved about getting down to it. They don't usually do it right away. But once they do it, women are bananas. They don't wanna do it, you can't make them do it, there's no way they'll do it - but once they do it, they don't let you alone.
Mel Brooks