We want to annoy the whenever we can. The best thing we can do with environmentalists is shoot them.

If drink sales are falling off, we get the pilots to engineer a bit of turbulence. That usually spikes sales.

Are we going to say sorry for our lack of customer service? Absolutely not.

The airline industry is full of bullshitters, liars and drunks. We excel at all three in Ireland.

University is the best couple of years of your life. Nowhere else can you drink and chase as many birds.

Why does every plane have two pilots? Really, you only need one pilot. Let's take out the second pilot. Let the bloody computer fly it.

I should get the Nobel peace prize - screw Bono.