A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short.
Look, I come from vaudeville, I come from burlesque, I come from heartaches, I come from sadness, I come from gladness, I come from work and sweat and respect for the craft.
Women liked me because I made them laugh.
My marriage license reads, 'To whom it may concern,'
You always pass failure on the way to success.
John Frances, Entertainment Chair, of the Friars Club: Of all the roasts that I have produced for the Friars Club, this is the one that I am most excited about. Mickey is one of the Club's dearest friends, and we wanted to honor him in the way we know best.