There were times when I was broke, when I was down in Florida and I had to go to cocktail parties for 500 bucks - to see the guy that used to be in pictures. I'm not ashamed of that. I've never done anything that I was ashamed of. I've done a lot of things I didn't mean to do.

And that's the way I have always lived, for the laughs – today. N-O-W. No Other Way.

I keep going because if you stop, you stop. Why retire? Inspire.

My marriage license reads, 'To whom it may concern,'

I don't regret anything I've ever done. I only wish I could have done more.

The audience and I are friends. They allowed me to grow up with them. I've let them down several times. They've let me down several times. But we're all family.

You always pass failure on the way to success.