When I was 19 years old, I was the number one star of the world for two years. When I was 40, nobody wanted me.

There were times when I was broke, when I was down in Florida and I had to go to cocktail parties for 500 bucks - to see the guy that used to be in pictures. I'm not ashamed of that. I've never done anything that I was ashamed of. I've done a lot of things I didn't mean to do.

My marriage license reads, 'To whom it may concern,'

If I ever complain to an agent about anything, he always has a pained look on his face, like, "How can you be so ungrateful? Why, Mick, I just named my yacht after you!"

Hey kids! Let's put on a show!

A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short.

Meadowlark Lemon is one very clever man, unique and truly one of a kind.