Neurotics have plenty of non-neurotic friends, but not for long.

Good food, good sex, good digestion, good sleep: to these basic animal pleasures, man has added nothing but the good cigarette.

Healthy parakeets have the nervous energy of tennis players.

The poor have the same basic pleasures as the rich, and the rich will always resent it.

An artist usually has no friends except other artists, and usually they do not like his work.

In any family, measles are less contagious than bad habits.

A hypochondriac is one who has a pill for everything except what ails him.