Neurotics have plenty of non-neurotic friends, but not for long.

Men enjoy being thought of as hunters, but are generally too lazy to hunt. Women, on the other hand, love to hunt, but would rather nobody knew it.

The young do not need God, and the old cannot find Him.

Hot dogs always seem better out than at home; so do French-fried potatoes; so do your children.

Many of us go through life feeling as an actor might feel who does not like his part and does not believe in the play.

People keep telling us about their love affairs, when what we really want to know is how much money they make and how they manage on it.

With each passing year, one has less to say, and knows better how to say it.