The human brain is special. It starts working as soon as you get up and it doesn't stop until you get to school.

I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.

Radio... that wonderful invention by which I can reach millions of people... who fortunately can't reach me.

Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list

My son gave me a nice bottle of cologne - Eau de Owe.

A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!

The human brain is special. It starts working as soon as you get up and it doesn't stop until you get to school.