My wife can't figure out what to buy me. What do you give a man who's had everything up to here?
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door, but only as long as it's not visible from the street.
Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.
My brother applied for work, but was told by the company that it had more employees than it needed. My brother said, "Don't worry. The little bit of work I do won't be noticed !!!"