My wife... its difficult to say what she does... she sells seashells on the seashore.

I hate sitting in traffic, because I always get run over.

Old ladies in wheelchairs with blankets over their legs, I don't think so...retired mermaids.

Easiest job in the world of course, Australian psychiatrist, "Gday Gday how you doing no worries next".

When my daughter was born she had jaundice, she was small, round and yellow. we called her Melony.

The worst job I ever had was as a forensicologist for the United Nations. One time I thought I'd come across the mass grave of a thousand snowmen, but it turns out it was just a field of carrots.

My parents said they had to make a lot of sacrifices to pay for my education... because they were both druids.