When you open the elevator on the top floor of a building and the other guy doesn't get out, something is seriously wrong.

If you're a fish and you want to be a fish-stick, you have to have very good posture.

Knock on wood is a saying for good luck. I think that started when someone went to someone's door to see if someone was home. "I hope Joe's home, knock on wood!"

Because of acid, I now know that butter is way better than margarine.

I like wearing necklaces, because it lets me know when I'm upside down.

The next time I move I hope I get a real easy phone number, something like 2222222. People will ask, "Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?" I'll say, "Just press two for a while, when I answer, you'll know that you've pressed two enough."

I hate flossing, I wish I just had one long curvy tooth. They didn't have to make separations for me.