I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.

My manager said, "Don't use liquor as a crutch!" I can't use liquor as a crutch, because a crutch helps me walk.

My lucky number is four billion. That doesn't come in real handy when you're gambling. "Come on, four billion! Darn! Seven. Not even close. I need more dice."

You know they call corn-on-the-cob, "corn-on-the-cob", but that's how it comes out of the ground. They should just call it corn, and every other type of corn, corn-off-the-cob. It's not like if someone cut off my arm they would call it "Mitch", but then re-attached it, and call it "Mitch-all-together".

2-in-1 is a stupid term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That's why 2 was created.

I'd like to get four people who do cart wheels very good, and make a cart.

I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.