I'm a mumbler. If I'm walking with a friend, and I say something, he says, "What?" So I say it again, and he says, "What?" Really, it's just some insignificant stuff I'm saying, but now I'm yelling, "That tree is far away!"

I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

My girlfriend works at Hooters. In the kitchen.

I saw a human pyramid once. It was very unnecessary. It did not need to exist.

I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.

I saw a seagull hanging out by a lake, but I said, "Don't worry, Dude. I won't say anything."

Hell, yeah! Meeting adjourned!