If Spiderman was real, and I was a criminal, and he shot me with his web, I would say, "Dude, thanks for the hammock."
I'm gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones.
What am I drinking? NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.
I am wearing a vest. If I had no arms, it would be a jacket.
A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.
I would like to go fishing and catch a fish stick. That would be convenient. I could easily get a job at Mrs. Paul's.