I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to wait".

I know people who believe in ghosts but don't believe in themselves.

I had my palm read. I wrote something on it first to see if she would read that too.

Dogs are forever in the push up postion.

I know people who believe in ghosts but don’t believe in themselves. It’s kind of sad. Okay you don’t think you’ll ever make it as a musician, but last night you saw a translucent caveman.

I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.

When I was a boy, I laid in my twin-sized bed and wondered where my brother was.