Love is like playing checkers. You have to know which man to move.
A woman is a woman until the day she dies, but a man's man only as long as he can
[On old age:] You wake up one morning and you got it.
Anytime you see me with my arms around an old man, I'm holding him for the police.
Use those brains that God put in your head.
It's no disgrace to be old. But damn if it isn't inconvenient.