Advice to children crossing the street: damn the lights. Watch the cars. The lights ain't never killed nobody.

Anytime you see me with my arms around an old man, I'm holding him for the police.

The teenagers aren't all bad. I love 'em if nobody else does. There ain't nothing wrong with young people. Jus' quit lyin' to 'em.

Use those brains that God put in your head.

Advice to children crossing the street: damn the lights. Watch the cars. The lights ain't never killed nobody.

My husband was so ugly, he used to stand outside the doctor’s office and make people sick.

Honey, that Totie Fields is one well-fed white woman. When that gal sits around the house, she sits around the house!