Gluten free pizza elicits the same response at a hollywood party that a pile of cocaine did in the 80's.
My friends who have babies can't do anything. You can't go out at night. Having a baby is like a DUI from the universe.
Don't be intimidated by my outfit, it's Forever 21.
Why does every flight attendant seem like they are going through a divorce?
Comedy is just one of the many professions that women are taking over.
Have you ever noticed that your ugliest friend is the most afraid of getting ruffied? It's like relax. YOU can take the coaster off your drink. There are at least three of us in line ahead of you.