Getting worried there might not be enough talent in America to acommodate all these singing shows.

Bragging that you had sex with a prostitute is like bragging that you got Doritos out of a vending machine.

Gluten free pizza elicits the same response at a hollywood party that a pile of cocaine did in the 80's.

It's a human instinct to be known.

Pop culture, it's crazy. There's all this violence in video games. In 'Call of Duty,' people are literally just blowing other people up. Hey, let's protect your country from your couch while eating your sandwich.

Have you ever noticed that your ugliest friend is the most afraid of getting ruffied? It's like relax. YOU can take the coaster off your drink. There are at least three of us in line ahead of you.

Make a sex tape, upload it, get on a reality show, release a perfume, retire. That's the new American dream.