Have you ever noticed that your ugliest friend is most afraid of being raped?
Bragging that you had sex with a prostitute is like bragging that you got Doritos out of a vending machine.
Your main contribution is spray painting your nickname on other people's things. And my cousin, who's a 'gangster', he's like, 'No, Tash, you don't understand; you throw a fat piece up there, that piece is yours.' I'm like, 'No one thinks you own Costco.'
The waiters in France could all be senators in the US.
Have you heard his new song? 'Cause he thinks he's a black man now.
Male comics are always coming up to me and they're like 'Hey Natasha. Don't you think you're a little attractive to be a comedian?' and I'm like 'Don't you think you're a little ugly to be talking to me?'