It's never too early for a cocktail.

There are bad times just around the corner, There are dark clouds travelling through the sky, And it's no good whining, About a silver lining, For we know from experience they won't roll by...

My body has certainly wandered a good deal, but I have an uneasy suspicion that my mind has not wandered enough.

Thousands of people have talent. I might as well congratulate you for having eyes in your head. The one and only thing that counts is: Do you have staying power?

Exercise is the most awful illusion. The secret is a lot of aspirin and marrons glaces.

I never cared who scored the goal, or which side won the silver cup. I never learned to bat or bowl; but I heard the curtain going up.

Television is for appearing on, not looking at.