In the first act, you get the audience's attention - once you have it, they will repay you in the second. Play through the laughs if you have to. It will only make the audience believe there are so many of them that they missed a few.

But why, oh why, do the wrong people travel, when the right people stay at home?

You always ought to have tom cats arranged, you know - it makes 'em more companionable.

How foolish to think that one can ever slam the door in the face of age. Much wiser to be polite and gracious and ask him to lunch in advance.

Conceit is an outward manifestation of inferiority.

Sunburn is very becoming - but only when it is even - one must be careful not to look like a mixed grill.

Fifty-four years of love and tenderness and crossness and devotion and unswerving loyalty. Without her I could have achieved a quarter of what I have achieved, not only in terms of success and career, but in terms of personal happiness.